Thoughts of you Mom

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When I go to my earliest memories, I’ve thought about you.
Walking me home from Kindergarten on a snowy icy street saying don’t run to turn around and see you were dropped to your bottom on the street, giggled once and ran faster. I still smile in the thought about you.
Remembering when the horse reared and put me on the ground spread eagle with him landing sitting between the legs of an eight year old I’ve thought how you came running. From my perceptions I was fine though when my thoughts go to you and only the horror you must have felt, I feel as I think about you then.
When I think of the tribulations I put you through always being in a hurry to grow, your thoughts were to slow down as my thoughts go back to you then.
Always supporting and protecting a child who had the fire to try it all deciding in my thoughts if repetition would occur.
I grew up moving a distance away, times together were few though my thoughts were with you.
Did I tell you enough how much I loved you, too little in returning to the view of being there and true.
Yesterday your great-granddaughter turned 15 and my thoughts were with you.
Today I remember the bitter cold January morn 15 years ago today when we gathered to say goodbye to you.
The bitter cold and fingers stinging I looked at your casket and the headstone with Dad’s name etched so many years before. Knowing neither were truly left in the ground that day, my thoughts were with you as you had been carried away.
My thoughts are with you often remembering how you taught me love and strength could walk hand in hand.
You live in my heart and soul with thoughts of you still being true in any day when I choose to be no more than a thought coming your way.
Namaste and love you mom more than I ever did say

Sitting in my sisters living room years ago amidst many adult family members, children and babies I was flipping through a magazine when my mom out of the blue asked “Linda what do you think God is?”. Taking a minute more to think and appear to be looking through the magazine before responding, then putting the magazine down and ready to respond the room had emptied of everyone who was present.
This was not a question mom had asked before and as a rule though respecting beliefs, seemingly common ground in beliefs had been present. Still taken back by a deafening silence I wondered where the room had emptied too? Looking towards my mom I responded I felt God was like the collagen of the universe, not being a singular entity, rather an energy. To my amazement all she responded was that she felt the same as well. In hindsight this would be the last question she asked of me in this world in regard to God, religion or my beliefs. Very soon afterwards mom passed unexpectedly. 
#thoughtofyou


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